This list of the dumbest criminals will make you feel like a rocket scientist. While it's nice to know that most criminals are too idiotic to follow through with their hair brained schemes, it's kind of depressing to realize how stupid a lot of people really are. The deplorable dumb dumbs on this list sound more like fictional characters than they do hardened criminals. But these crime fails are all totally real. And yes, that includes the guys who tried to rob a grocery store while riding a donkey. These are the worst criminals ever, who were just too stupid to be successful.
This collection of the dumbest criminals of all time ranges from almost the entire state of Florida, to people who committed crimes in police stations, and a guy who tried to sell weed to a detective. How do you think that ended for him?!
Hopefully after reading about the idiots on this list of dumb criminals you'll have learned some life lessons. For instance, don't try to write yourself a $360 billion check. You can't do that. No one will cash it for you. If you steal an iPad, maybe don't take selfies with everyone in your crew the moment you get back to your house. Selfies can wait for when you have changed the iCloud account to "not the original owner's." And please, stop drinking and driving - even if you're driving with one eye closed to counteract the double vision, it's just not a good idea.
Vote up the dumbest of the dumb criminals on this list of idiotic crimes that completely failed.
http://www.ranker.com/list/dumb-criminals/jacob-shelton, crime, criminals, other,
Man Steals Pork Loin from Sam's Club by Shoving it Down His Pants
Police say a man stole a pork loin from Sam's Club by stuffing it in his pants and running out of the store without paying. After the theft, he approached a store greeter who though he was just happy to see him.
Source: NJ.com
Florida Man Answers Call from Security Company During Robbery
Amateur criminal and professional dumb dumb Christopher Kron made every mistake possible in robbery history when he tried to rob a restaurant after it closed one night. Not only did he trip the silent alarm, but when ADT called the restaurant after being notified, Kron answered the phone and gave them his REAL NAME. He returned to the restaurant the next day and was recognized by an employee who had seen the surveillance video. Kron was arrested on the spot.
Source: NBC
No Charges for Woman Who Threw Bacon into Police Station
A judge has dismissed charges against a Massachusetts woman who threw uncooked bacon and sausage inside a police station while saying she was there to "feed the piggies." Lindsey McNamara was charged with disorderly conduct and malicious destruction of property after the incident, which was caught on video surveillance.
Source: CBS News
Dallas Dummy Tries to Cash Check for Billions of Dollars
Charles Ray Fuller, a Texas dumb dumb, tried to cash a bogus check for $360 BILLION. To top it off, the check wasn’t even made out to him. He was arrested on forgery charges and sentenced to a million billion years in prison.
Source: CBS
Man Attempts Carjacking in Prison Parking Lot
Things were looking up for Frank Singleton when he was released from jail. However, when he realized that he didn’t have a ride home, he walked straight into the prison parking lot and attempted to carjack a woman. He was foiled when he realized that he couldn’t drive a car with a stick shift. As he was re-arrested - this time, for felony carjacking - Singleton told police that he simply “didn’t feel like walking.” We've all been there.
Source: WPTV
Man Arrested for Making Meth in a Park Restroom
Police were notified of chemical smoke emanating from a park men’s room, and stopped by to witness meth being cooked out of a single pot. Justin Hill, the Walter White Wannabe, was arrested and later released on $56,000 bail.
Source: Huffington Post
Pair Spent Two Days "Locked" in (Unlocked) Closet
A Florida man and woman spent two days trapped in what they said they believed to be a locked closet - until police let them out and discovered that the door was actually never locked.
John Arwood and Amber Campbell claimed they were chased into a janitor's closet at Daytona State College in Daytona Beach, FL, by unidentified assailants. They were charged with trespassing and Campbell was also charged with violating her probation.
Source: USA Today
Dimwit Calls Police After Pig Eats His Weed
An Ohio man reportedly called 911 numerous times, threatening to harm himself, after he had downed an entire bottle of Everclear because his pet pig, Millie, had eaten all of his marijuana. He was charged with disorderly conduct and later said that he would keep his weed out of reach of his pot bellied pig.
Source: Huffington Post
Florida Man Marks Occupation as Drug Dealer on Arrest Report
A West Palm Beach, FL man was arrested on a slew of charges, and was perhaps a bit too honest on his arrest report. He listed his occupation as "drug dealer" and was charged with being the most obvious criminal in the history of crime.
Source: Florida Times Union
Robber Gives Cashier His Phone Number
18 year old Ruben Zarate wanted to rob a muffler shop in Chicago and demanded money. Unfortunately it was mostly in the safe. Zarate decided that he would try again later. To save himself some time, he left his cell phone number with the store employees. That way, they could call him when the manager returned.
Source: News Sentinel